KLUGSTER

April 24, 2011

CRAPPY IDEAS

Filed under: HUMOR,INTERTAINMENT — klugster @ 3:44 PM
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When an idea goes through a person’s head they either act on those ideas or they forget about them. Sometimes a person may ponder the idea a while to determine if it is a good or bad idea.

 But what if an idea comes to you while sitting on the toilet? Then, does it become a crappy idea? “I wonder how many of the greatest inventions of the world have been thought of on the toilet.” I have never heard of anything that was invented on the toilet, or anyone talking about their crappy inventions.

I suppose it would be very hard to market anything that was invented on the toilet. Who would buy anything that originated as a crappy idea. However there are many products that might have been invented on the toilet.

Everyone has bought something and referred to it as crap. Maybe the idea for the item was created on the toilet. For instance a crappy phone that does not work. How about the crappy computer?  We all know of someone with a car that won’t run, “that they call a crappy car”. There are televisions and electronic equipment that we call crap. Just maybe they were all thought of on the toilet.

What about jokes that no one likes? We call them crappy jokes, they must have been thought of on the toilet. Ever take your phone to the bathroom and have a crappy conversation?

What about reading a book or magazine or the newspaper on the toilet, if you don’t like the article then would it be a crappy story?

Just the other day I was on the toilet, when the wife told me through the door, that she was leaving. I opened door and threw her a kiss. “She replied, I could keep my crappy kiss”

As you can probably guess there lays the idea for this crappy article.

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May 21, 2010

BP OIL SPILL SPELLS BANKRUPTCY

As the world waits to see if BP can contain the massive oil spilling into the Gulf of Mexico, in what will probably be the world’s worst oil disaster when it is all over. Everyone is also lining up to sue the oil giant for all the damage that is going to develop.

 Everything from personal injury for the workers that survived the explosion of the oil rig to the relatives of the 11 that died. The fisherman, that are now working for BP to help clean up the mess to the many business that are losing money from lost revenue.

 Then there is the various levels of the government that will be getting their hands greased from BP, as they level fines on the company for negligence for the hurt workers and the deaths of workers and of course the leak itself.

  Then there will be each individual state from Texas to Florida that will be looking to get their share of money for the cleanup costs and environmental issues that will arise for many years, after the leak is stopped.

 All of this of course will be after the leak is stopped. Just think about how much money BP is shelling out daily trying to stop the leak, and to contain the leak which has gotten so far out of hand, that astronauts in space can see the spill from space. Right now BP is spending so much money trying to stop the leak and contain the spill that their accounting department is working overtime writing the checks to everyone involved.

 Other factors that BP is now going to have to face is that many investors are going to want to cash out while they can, their stock is slowly starting to go south, also BP is going to see a backlash from the consumer at the pump as many will boycott the company.

 BP bank accounts are leaking so much money, just like the leaking oil well in the ocean. It will take time but the giant BP is slowly leaking in the Gulf with their fallen rig. Some people have already asked can BP survive this. It is hard to think or believe that any single company can handle the whole burden and survive this type of disaster.

 In about 2 years I will not be surprised when the pretty green BP signs around town come down and are replaced with another big oil giant of the world. It’s just a matter of time before their money well runs dry and they end up  going bankrupt or have to be bought out by someone else.

August 12, 2009

HEALTH CARE REFORM SOLUTION

As the president tries to get a new plan in affect that gives everyone the chance to have health insurance,  the people with their own hidden agendas are coming out and creating mass chaos to get the people on their side of the agenda. These so called town hall meetings are becoming nothing  more than a traveling circus.

This country needs a total re- haul of our health care system, everyone agrees to this but with so many lobbyists and politicians trying to get their own agendas and pockets lined, it almost seems that we may never get a system for all the people.

I say we put all the big players in a round  room with no windows together and do not let them out till they come up with a plan that is totally beneficial to the people. No food or water, no devises that they can communicate with the outside world. No bathroom  only a  bucket in the middle of the room for them to use with one ply toilet paper. As they make progress they get a real bathroom break and then food and water as they continual to show progress.

Once a plan is put together that they believe will work for everyone. They put in a stipulation that they have to meet in 1 year in the same room to work out any bugs in the plan that is not working and continue to do this every year, till the plan is actually the best health care system in the world.

May 20, 2009

SUPERBOWL 2014 BIDDING

The NFL is taking bids from cities to host the 2014 game.  Potential host cities from Florida and Arizona and other sites with NFL teams will be bidding for the game, as well as the city of London. I have to ask why the city of London?

The NFL has been playing expedition games in other cities trying to expand into  markets other than the U.S.  They even used to have the world league, which also was used to give young  players a venue to show NFL teams that they could play on a professional level.

However NFL football has always been an American sport. The league was created and it was founded in the U.S.  All of the teams that make up the league are from the U.S.

 It would only make since that the championship game should always be played on American soil.  In a time when alot of American companies are moving to foreign countries for the cheaper labor, now our beloved sport of football wants to give it’s biggest game away to a foreign city to host.

I want to be the first to tell the NFL, that I object to the idea of London or any foreign city of hosting the Superbowl of American football.

April 20, 2009

ROAD RAGE

Filed under: HUMOR,OPINION,PEOPLE — klugster @ 6:33 AM
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It is so easy today, to get upset with other drivers out on the roads. When I was learning how to drive, I was taught to pay attention to the road and not let ourselves get distracted. But today there are so many distractions that I am surprised that there is not more accidents on the roads.

 

Used to be, that to get distracted from the road you were probably looking at something off the side of the road, or fidgeting with something in your car. Maybe you were talking to other people in the car when you went in the other lane with out even realizing it.

 

Today all of those still apply but, thanks to modern technology, we have more thing’s to distract us from our driving. Today we have our cell phones to talk on. We can not put them down to drive; we have to hold it to our ear just talking about nothing. At the same time not realizing we just cut a car off, or ran some poor slab off the road. Changing lane to lane with out looking to see where the other cars are. I personally like the ones kneeling comfortly, with their arm on the middle console, looking straight ahead with their phones plastered to their ear. They are the worst.

 

Then we have texting, which has taken the world by storm. We love to text while driving because we are such great drivers and just have to send that text, because the person I am texting to need’s to read what I have to say. Otherwise the world just may come to end if I don’t send that text now. What was that bump in the road? Who cares? Let me send one more text.

 

How about the portable DVD players? I have seen people with them on their dash and on their seat watching them as they drive. Do not have the time to watch that DVD last night, that’s all right I will watch it on my way to work. Was that a dog that just ran out in front of me?

 

I have seen people shaving while driving, with their electric shavers, looking in the mirror to see how they did. I used to get stuck behind a lady every morning putting her make-up on. After a couple of days of this, I started to honk and ride her ass; she paid me no attention and kept doing her make up. I hoped she would hit a bump and her make up would go up her nose.

 

 One day I pulled into a convenient store to get some coffee and the make up lady pulled in beside me. When I came back out to my car she was sitting in her car putting lip stick on her lips. As I was getting in my car I yelled to her that it did no help her looks at all. The look on her face was priceless.

 

I have seen people reading books while driving. I have seen one lady opening her mail while driving. She had one of those knives that cuts open the envelope, and then she would read it. I was beside her for about a mile on the highway just watching her read her mail.

 

I had a lady that hit me from behind while driving down the street. She said that she did not see me stop. I told her that I had not stopped or even hit my brakes till she hit me. She told me that she was talking to her cat when she hit me. I looked in her car and saw an animal carrier in the back seat.  I did not see the cat but assumed it was in the carrier. Later, when I told the cop about her talking to her cat, he said she told him that she was talking to the cat on her cell phone.

 

These are all the same people that oppose any kinds of new laws that forbid talking on their phones while driving. New driving on cell phone laws are being proposed in different cities everyday. I do not believe that we need new laws ,just better driving etiquette among drivers.

I can understand how some people get road rage and get into fights with other drivers. We all here about it and have had a moment of almost crossing that line. We all need to remember that the right to drive is a privilege. With that privilege is the responsibility to be the best driver that we can be, by keeping our attention to the driving. All the other distractions that we give ourselves need to be dealt with after we get out of the car.

 

 

 

                                                                                                                     

 

 

 

 

April 16, 2009

WRITING ABOUT NOTHING

Filed under: HUMOR,INTERTAINMENT,PEOPLE — klugster @ 10:58 AM
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I  had heard about blogging and had to see what it was about.  So I checked out some of the sites and read what people were saying.  I soon realized that everyone is a poet, a writer,  critic, news reporter, story teller,  and comedians. People talk and write about everything that you can think of.

I finally decided I could write a blog myself,  it could not be that hard. First I had to decide what I would write about.  I had all kinds of ideas, and I did not want to be one of those that write about nothing. So here I  am writing my first blog about blogging.  What a way to start out. 

I remember many years ago when I was in grade school, one of the teachers got the class in to writing to a pen pal somewhere across the world. I had written letters to family members but never to someone that i did not know. What was I going to write.  I wrote a couple of times to my pal but after a while I got no letters back. I thought that maybe I was boring  to write to, or maybe my pal could not understand my letters or writings. I wonder if anyone still writes to pen pals?

Now we have the Internet and the whole world is our pen pal. My how we have come along ways since then and it is still changing daily. I wonder what new type of letter writing  and communication we can expect in the future.

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